Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Good Feeling.

I am head over heals happy.


Danny and i are having an absolute amazing time together.
I feel like ive known him for ages when really weve only been this close for about 11 days.
Anyways heres the catch up.

19th of Jan,
I took Danny out to nandos, cos he'd never been before, he looooved it! :) and i loved his company.
Because i paid for dinner he wanted to take me out to the cinema, but there was nothing on we wanted to see, so we went to Asda got sweeties and movies!
Went back to his and watched Dinner For Shmucks -YUSS and Due Date- hahhah.
After Due Date, we started talking, and due date started again in the background, by the time Danny took me home it was playing for a third time...thats how long we sat and talked!! haha. Then he came back to mines and we cuddled, and talked until 6.30am...he then left and went straight to work, i had an hours sleep then went to college and work...

My sexy man :) 

20th/21st of Jan,
I had hurt my back, so i was sent home early from work and went straight to Dannys! 
He cuddled me all night and we stayed up late and talked, lay on the floor listened to music and laughed lots. The next day my back was still sore, so i took the day of work and spent the whole day with my baby. We went to the shops, got some munchies, and Heinz Tomato soup for dinner!
I was ment to go home Saturday night but instead i stayed again, and i made candles out of the tomato soup tins, and i had an amazing relaxing bath while Danny went to go see his friend for a bit.
He then came back home and we went to bed together, was nice and cosy, i had to leave dead early in the morning for work though :( but Danny walked me to the bus stop! 

23rd/24th Jan,



Decided i was gonna make Danny dinner, so i cooked spaghetti bolognese for monday night and Chilli Con Carne for Tue night.
I came over late on monday, and we had dinner together, we stayed up late and talked and got to know each other even more, its amazing how long we can sit and talk and not get bored. I feel so close to Danny, and so comfortable. Its amazing.
Tuesday morning, Danny had to leave at 6am for work :( 
I spent the day in his house, editing photos and chilling out :)

woke up without Danny :(


Rocking Danny's hoodie



My tats!





Bed :)


DANNY :D 
came home from work, and i made us dinner, then we spent a really nice night together :)


Brushing my teeth!


Still brushing my teeth...


My transfer tats!




HIYA!



I love my big blue jumper :)


turning Danny's shirt into a dress haha



Mr grumpy in the morning :)



Wrote on his milk...why no eh? :)



Rocking the hoody again..


I feel so crazy for Danny its unreal, i was scared i wasn't going to feel like this again and now i cant even stop it, i can't stop thinking about him, or missing him.
Hes always on my mind and i can't wait to see him again,
The other night he turned to me and said
"ive got a really good feeling about us"
at first it just made me smile, but now thinking about it so do i, how can someone be so perfect ??



MOVING ONTO OTHER NEWS- WERE GETTING A DOG!! 

MEET RUBY!


I also got a white iphone 4 :) happppeee




Wednesday, 18 January 2012

Better Days :)

Jamie Crighton was supposed to come over in the morning and paint my wall, but he got locked in Seonaids flat... donkey :p so he's coming over tomorrow instead :)
Went up Livi to meet Heather and we had a really good gossip and a catch up, really enjoyed it :)

Later, Daniel came and got me and we went back to his, where he cooked me Fahjitas for dinner...mmm :)
Then we watched 27 dresses, with turkish subtitles and Ice Age :D laughed a lot.
After the films we started listening to music, after a couple of songs, i put on my favourite song Better Days by The Goo Goo Dolls and we both lay on the floor and listened too it, when the best bit of the song came on, he kissed me :) :) :)

The rest of the night we just laughed, listened to music, cuddled and kissed :) was lovely.
He dropped me off at Paul's at 2am, where i stayed over and Paul took me to college in the morning!

Cutie with my hat n' scarf :) 


i would also like to welcome to the world, my new baby bro only an hour old in the pic -
 MARLON WILLIAM BRAUN!





ABSOLUTE CUTIE,  i look forward to meeting you :) 

Monday, 16 January 2012

Nagging: If all else fails, SAY IT LOUDER :D

Scotts off the table.
soooo...the other night i ended up staying at Scotts, we just cuddled up and watched tv, and i fell asleep nothing more. In the morning we went to his Charity organisation event thing, and i left an hour later for work!
After that didn't hear sqwat from him, something changed, Paul also told me that he said he still doesn't want a girlfriend, so what does he want with me?!
Sunday comes around, and i still hadn't heard from him, so i text him asking what was going on as sunday was ment to be our date... and he cancelled. Probably for the best.
Hung out with Paul instead and we had a lovely evening to ourselfs! i bought, Leap Year, Love Happens, The Back Up Plan and My Best Friends Girl!


Jan 3rd i got this message,
cutest surprise ever.

would never have expected this in a million years, we have been talking alot since then!
The other day i was locked out my house so i waited in McDonalds in Bathgate and he came to keep me company, and we just sat for over 2 hours and talked, i really enjoyed it. First time weve met up and we had fun :)
so were still talking a lot, and i think i'm going round to his tomorrow and hes gonna cook me Fajhitas! were ment to be having a Harry Potter-athon but i dont know if well have enough time!!
hes so sweet to me and hes absolutely adorable!
Really looking forward to seeing him... :)

the only downside... hes a friend of Steves.

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

The Finish Line.

My first flowers i've ever had bought for me.

i thought i knew it all, 
i've been through the highs, said all my good byes.
its not worth fighting for, if one of us is sure, dying, trying to find love's cure.
i have waited all my life, to paint these city's red, the thoughts i've always had stuck inside my head,
its not worth waiting for if one of us wants more, and one of us is dying trying to find loves door.
when we learn how to fly we forget how to walk, 
when we learn how to sing, don't wanna hear each other talk,
when we know what we want, we forget what we need,
when you find what you are, you'll forget about me.
here we are at the finish line.


??
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my dress, and bowa that i got at the party! :)

Me and Heather :)

Me and Lornalita :)

Hey Sexy!
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So, I had my Primark party on Saturday and it was a lot of fun! Didn't stay very long as i got picked up for the d2 party! Paul and i were close and kissed at the party, and a lot of people spoke to me about us it was looking hopeful, but now that i know how i feel its not the best idea.

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After the party, paul and i went back to the hotel, He hid my eyes when he took me inside and left an outfit for me to change into, in the bathroom.
When i came out there whole room was lit up with candles and there were flowers everywhere, it was the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me.


Paul with a Rose. 
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We were both very drunk, so the night didn't go as we had planned.
In the morning we talked about what had happened, i felt guilty and like i didn't deserve everything Paul had done for me, I told him to cancel the plans we had for him to take me out to dinner that night because i didn't want him to spend anymore money on me. He was hurt and upset that i didn't to be with him and it kills me that i've hurt him so much :(

When i saw how much effort he had put into everything i realised that i felt guilty and it must be because my feelings aren't as strong for him, i don't want to lead him on. I know that being with Scott also upsets Paul which makes me feel really shitty.
As i am still seeing Scott, Paul has decided he wants some space to help.

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Paul making me laugh like a goon :) 

uussssss :)

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a wee while back...
But i love it :)

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Moving on to Scott...


So Scott came and got me yesterday and we went for a drive, was really cool just talking and getting to know each other as he's a very interesting person. We weren't close all night which i kind of liked because i don't want to move to fast.
i got a goodbye kiss though :)

I saw him again tonight. We got a Domino's two for Tuesdays! 
This time we were a lot closer, we watched 'The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button' and cuddled.
We also kissed a few times which was nice, he always winds me up and it makes me smile, he's also very good to cuddle.

He's taking me on a big fancy date on Sunday im so exited!!
Out for dinner then to a wee bar, i think!
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Angela and I went out in Edi! we had a great laugh :)



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FINALLY Saw Jamie again! 
We went to Nando's and had an awesome catch up, gonna try and see him more again, i miss him!!
he also stole this for me, cos i wanted it :)

Lets see what else life throws at me! 

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Wednesday, 4 January 2012

love triangle. "it's not getting easier, it's not getting easier"

Started out with a kiss how did it end up like this??
-you are my sweetest down fall.

This is the first time i've properly spoken about this on my blog, but i finally thought to myself why not?

So Scott was dead sweet and told me that he would bring me whatever i wanted for dinner, so i picked a chinese :) mm, he brought it over while i was babysitting. We then went to my room, we talked for a long time and listened to a lot of music, Boyce Avenue. At the end of the night/ morning (3am) he kissed me.  He was being really cute, and talking about taking me on a date, we spoke about this restaurant that only sells starters- looking forward to that!

I stayed at Paul's last night, it was amazing. We also went to dinner in South Queensferry, were we had gone for our first friendship date. We stopped by Asda to get chocolates and fruit, melted the chocolates and ov course dipped in the fruit...mm mm mmmm. We stayed up until 5am and watched Valentines day - we were in a totally happy lovey dovey mood and then we watched The Butterfly Effect, very good movie - wrong timing Paul!! Then we watched some of The Perfect Man. We snuggled up and slept until 2pm then next day, then we watched the rest of the perfect man and then Stranger Than Fiction i really enjoyed that movie. We went back to mine and had dinner.

We had to come to the conversation that had been on both our minds, tbh all three of our minds.

what the hell are we gonna do ??

I know i can have a lot of fun with Paul, and he'd treat me amazingly and do anything for me, I also know that he would never stop trying to make me happy. 
I don't know where the situation with Scott may lead, but i'm also intrigued. I'm exited to try something this new and have fun with it. he seems like he could be a lot of what i've been looking for and a lot of what i always wanted from Steve.
trouble is, who do i pick? 
who is right?
which choice hurts the least people?

Paul told Scott how he feels so chances are that things between Scott and I wont develop, i think i would like them to though.
I'd love to give Paul and I a proper chance, but i don't know if it will end worse.
I still get tingles and butterflies when i kiss him, and we have a great time together.

Paul and i have the hotel booked for Saturday, i've told him how i feel about the situation, i'd like to try with Scott, and if i feel now already like trying with someone else thats not a strong foundation for Paul and me, it also doesn't look promising on making sure he doesn't get hurt. We have decided to make the hotel night whatever we want it to be, out chance to be everything to each other, after that we can decide whats best, i know he wants me, i think i want him i just don't know how much. I don't want to lead him on or hurt him in anyway, 
I fucked up new years, got so pissed i don't remember the bells, snogged some dude who didn't matter, and shouted for Paul all night until he came and got me at 3am. We then went to a party at his mates house, where he told em that i was going as his. i loved that, we were close all night. He even kissed me in front of his friends. The worst part was i hadn't even intended on getting drunk , i drank 3 shots and thats it - my mistake - i forgot i hadn't eaten. such. an. idiot.
I enjoyed the rest of new years and they whole of the next day we spent in bed together. it was a really nice time. 29 hours we spent together, but amazing 29 hours at that.

so saturday is the hotel, and sunday is Paul's birthday, i have work 1-7 both days but i'm sure we'll still make the most of it.

i'm so bloody confused, i wish everyone was happy an noone was being hurt.

“Better never means better for everyone... It always means worse, for some.”