a great life starts with a great attidude :)

steve and have beenn continuously Arguing for well over a month now. it got to much for both of us, we were aways angry at eachother, there really wasn't much love anymore. The argument we had last night was he closest we had ever come to the end, it as heart breaking, all wanted was my bear back, and we were in such  tangled mess, it almost looked like the only way out, would be to end the relationship. I wasn't going to let that happen!
Steve has been a great inspiration to me aswell as an amazing friend, he's always kind, and gentle.
I think about him so much because admire his potential, enthusiasm, talent and his constant buzz to be busy and do everything to the best of his ability.
He is an amazing person, which is why I  like having him close, he is a master of good advice. My constant interest in spending time with him scared him away, so much he felt trapped leaving a break up the only escape, I feel angry at myself for causing this. which is why I have adopted a new attitude.
With a good attidude you can sore, with abad attidude you can be as distructive as a tornadoe, wich I was.
Letting my bad attidude take over me,made me cause more distruction, to our realationship, than ever thought possible.

So- new attidude, starts today.
Steve and I have decided to take some time apart, with little conatct, hopfully this will help us to rebuild our once amazing realtionship.
Like my best friend Angela always  says " space can never be a bad thing " Germany proved to me, that it actually brings us closer together.
So here goes Pat + Steve Take 2. :)

Also waiting for my Nandos job interview-going to ace it :) if I don't get... everything happens for a reason :)

"Stones taught me to fly, Love taught me to cry, so c'mon courage, teach me to be shy,

cos its not hard to fall, and i don't wanna scare him, 

it's not hard to fall, i don't wanna loose him."

Don't know whats going on right now with steve, hopefully things will sort them selfs out as time goes by. I miss how we used to be, i miss him making plans, i need to clear me head and decide some things, see what options we have. I'm so confused, i don't know what he wants from me. I don't know how long he expects me to wait on something, how many times i have to get my hopes up. Time will tell...maybe time will make me more patient...or just numb to being last.

"I'll pick you up when your down, be there when no ones around, 

when your in unfamiliar places, count on me through life's changes.,Everything about this is real, 

count on me through life's changes. I know your the one, yeah, yeah.

Crash into me, at full speed, so we can collide, "

typography

My positive thinking wall 

i loveee it,

cant wait for my saying to be finished by Jamie!

making my room a nicer place :)

Credit goes to Drops Of Jupiter blogger, love her 'for the literate' posts.

Positive Thinking.

My computer wallpaper-

Inspired by Drops Of Jupiter blogger.

Religion

My newest college assignment, as well as the 7billion others i have to manage...anyways heres Religion.

So had the house to myself for the weekend, managed to get my wee steve to stay with me friday night, he fell asleep pretty quickly...we still had a nice night :) i had a bad dream and woke up and snuggled right into him, so glad he was there :)

Had Lorna staying the next night, and i stayed at wee Anges the next. Shes my model for this religion image.

Got Steves birthday night out next weekend, really looking forward to it.

Flicks flat is friggin' cool, im loving it.

songs -

A team - Ed Sheeran

Collide - Leona Lewis

Moves like jagger - Maroon 5

What makes you beautiful - One direction << ( OMG.) 

Closing time - Semisonic.

I GOT DEM MOVES LIKE JAGGER.

Zebra.

So went into college today to see if my lecturer liked my over 60's..which he did PHEW.

steve took me in and then went back with him too :) we just chilled out and had a really nice wee time, helped him make a cool wee design for his website!

We also came onto the topic of my blog...

Steve if your reading this.. PEE OFF :P

You put your arms around me and i'm home.

This video kept me sane. has been on repeat for too long. i love her, i love her tattoos i love these songs.

 

Quotes i feel close to.

"you put your arms around me and i'm home"

"the memory of being here with you is one i'm going to take my life through, some days stay gold. Forever."

<3

gutted like a fish.

i havent done this in soooo long.
its pretty crap tbh, i should'of blogged my AMAZING summer.
back to reality now though. i miss Germany every day, i miss my dad anna and laura so much :(
college has already been a bomb, so many assessments...
one im working on

Over 60's living life to the full.

Germany with steve was my absolute dream. Being with my family and having him there in my wee magical place, made everything. we were so in love after not seeing each other for 3 months it was beautiful. He lit candles for me and all such romantic things <3 

coming home was hard, i still havent unpacked and its been 3 weeks. i dont want to believe Germanys over.

I have my own exhibition there next year which is my proudest achievement. 

i have to start blogging my emotions again. Talking to yourself is the best cure to insanity.


<3